Darling, Honey, Sweetie, Grr!

Sometimes, the use of endearing terms, such as Darling, Honey, Sweetie, etc are good. They can whisper to a loved one that you care about them. They can say “I love you” without using the words.

However, there are times that the use of these terms is not loving. In fact, the use of these terms is meant to put down the “opponent”. The term says, in effect, “You are being childish, so I may safely ignore your logical arguments.”

Here are some healthy uses of terms of endearment:
When alone having a casual conversation with someone you care about and she says something like, “honey, I need to go to the kitchen for a tea, should I get something for you?” or, “Darling, can you massage my back, I tweaked it earlier”.

Here is an example of an unhealthy use of a term of endearment:
You: “… so in summation, these are my logical arguments in favor of this idea over that idea.”
Opponent: “Honey, listen to me, you’re wrong.”

As far as I’m concerned, using these terms in an argument is the same as conceding that you are wrong and you have only condensation and an ad hominem attack for defense.


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