Posts Tagged ‘sister’

Orange pants

January 11, 2011

My sister is getting married in a few weeks. She is a huge Mets fan. Every year, that the Mets play at home on her birthday, she gets her name on the scoreboard. Her wedding colors are, obviously, blue and orange.
My siblings are dressing appropriately.
I toyed with getting a blue suit and an orange shirt, but I don’t think I’d wear a blue suit ordinarily. Therefore, it seems like a waste. The alternative is to get orange pants. I already have a blue shirt.

What do orange pants “say” about their wearer? Could I wear orange pants day-to-day or at bars?

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Vacation: Cancelled

December 13, 2010

I spoke to my engaged sister over the weekend. She explained her reasons for setting the wedding for so soon after her engagement. The reasons I speculated about at the end of my last post were incorrect.
She made it clear that she would really like me to attend her wedding.
Today I canceled my ticket.

I don’t know when I’ll reschedule the trip. I don’t know dates I’ll be able to take off from work in order to book a flight.

It’s been a rough day. Bring on karaoke.

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Wedding and Israel

December 7, 2010

I spent a lot of time researching the best time to take my vacation this Winter. I negotiated with my managers over the course of three weeks before we settled on dates.
Finally, on November 1, 2010 I purchased my tickets to fly to Israel on January 23, 2011 and to New York on February 6, 2011.

I informed my parents and siblings of my plans and I let my ex-wife know that I would be unavailable during those two weeks.

One of my younger sisters decided to accept a marriage proposal just prior to Thanksgiving.
A couple of weekends ago she warned me that they were considering a January 30th wedding. I informed her that I already purchased my ticket and if they held it that date, I probably wouldn’t be there.

On Friday December 3, 2010 she informed that they did, in fact, book the wedding for January 30th.*

I didn’t want to change my plans, but I felt like I was “required” to research my options. I called the airline. They told me I’d be charged a minimum of $250.00 to change my flight plans.
I spoke to my management. They didn’t want to be blamed (how they phrased it) for keeping me from attending my sister’s wedding, so they agreed to re-open negotiations to plan my vacation dates. However, they made it clear that they wanted me to go on vacation sooner rather than later.

(Basically, they expect a lot of projects to begin in February 2011, so they want all hands on deck.)

I called my brother in Israel to find out what he was doing and to hear what he thought. He’ll be coming in for her wedding. He offered to let me use his apartment while he’s away (especially if his whole family travels with him). He agreed that I am not obligated to change my plans because they knew the situation before they chose January 30.


* When I ask people advice, they usually ask why is she getting married so soon after meeting the guy and why does she need to get married on that particular weekend?
I haven’t spoken to her about it. However, I think my dad is imposing his belief that engagements should be short. This belief might work for ultra-Orthodox Jews and its practice might be appropriate for people who buy into that way of life, but I think it’s a mistake for my sister.
My sister is a sincere, god-believing, ethical, Orthodox-practicing, commandment keeping person. But she is not ultra-Orthodox.
She should have a “normal” Orthodox engagement period of 3 to 6 month. I hope I’m wrong, but I believe that this shortened time line will have negative repercussions.

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It’s Clothing Time

February 15, 2010

As I mention in the “My Alternate Weekend” post, for now I’m required to bring the children to my parents when I have them for the Jewish weekly holiday. When we go to my parents, we usually stay in my youngest brother’s room. Because he’s twelve and because at one point his room was the storage location for unneeded clothing, his room is a mess.
(When we go over, I spend at least 30 minutes cleaning it up, but it really requires a complete overhaul and about 4-6 hours of focused cleaning.)
My son has a tendency to remove his clothing at odd intervals. Since, all the children are frantic and seemingly in perpetual motion, it can be difficult to keep track of where he took off what and, therefore, where it is.
Early on I feared that there could be negative consequences to returning the children in dirty clothes and to losing the clothes they arrived in. To prevent either of those possibilities, I implemented a complete wardrobe change the moment they walked into my parent’s home. They would arrive in the clothes their mother dressed them in. Immediately, upon entering my parent’s home, they would be stripped and re-dressed in clothing I got for them. I would store all the outfits they arrived with in a shopping bag. Anything dirty, I would wash.
When it was time for them to return to their mother, I’d remove their weekend clothing and reacquaint their bodies with the clothing with which they arrived. This, at least, was the theory. In actuality, something always got lost.
It got even more complicated when they started bringing clothes from their mother to wear over the weekly holiday. The amount of clothing to keep track of not only doubled, but the interval of them being “exposed” to loss increased exponentially.
Each weekend that I’d have them I’d worry about losing clothing. When I’d return them, something would always be missing. My soon to be ex-wife would complain about the missing item. I’d call my siblings, ask them to search for the item and put it aside for me. Most of the time, the item was found and returned. Sometimes, the item could not be retrieved.

I would spend so much time worrying about the clothing situation that it affected my ability to enjoy the time with my children.
The last time I had the children, I was successful at returning every article of clothing. However, I hadn’t even gotten home when she called to complain that top to a medicine crusher was missing.

This weekend, she requested that I mind them an extra 2.5 hours, because she wouldn’t be home until later. I agreed. About 3 hours before I was supposed to return them to their mother, I saw that my son’s pants were missing. I asked my siblings to do a quick search through my parent’s home, but it yielded no results.

When I returned the children, she was understandably upset. I tried to explain the situation, but she insisted that when she has him at her place, he’s a total angel. She threatened to write up a list of items that have gone missing and press for me to pay restitution for each of them.

I walked away without responding. I understand her frustration with clothing being lost. I share it. I know if i had them at my apartment, no clothing would go missing. However, even without excuses, shouldn’t I get some credit for taking care of them for longer than initially planned? Oh well, people generally don’t change.

{500} days of Summer

February 5, 2010

In honor of watching “{500} Days of Summer” last night with my sister, I’m posting my original review of the film from Wednesday, August 5, 2009 :

I went to see 500 days of Summer last night with my sister. I went primarily because Regina Spektor’s “Us” plays during the trailer. (The movie’s opening is remarkably similar to the trailer.)

It got bad reviews because it jumps around time. Sometimes looking at “good” days and sometimes jumping ahead to “bad” days. I don’t like movies like that because they get confusing. Quickly. It annoyed me during this movie also, but the story was good enough to keep me interested.

I started out the film really disliking the guy and his sister. As the movie progressed, my feeling towards him changed slightly.

I highly recommend* this movie to people who can follow a plot that is not as straightforward as the normal Hollywood plot.

* – Highly recommend. Think 7.5-8.5 out of 10!